To Jane

Your son seems to be having some secrets, secret stuff to do alone in his room, and it's connected with his friends, because it is a secret why he stopped meeting with them. Such secrets in childhood usually mean business creation. I think he is trying to start a business. And I am sorry for external spilling the beans. But whatever he is doing, even if not exactly that, it must be absorbing and fascinating. Definitely this is not any pain or problem that's keeping him to himself, definitely it is something passionate that is best done alone, or in secret contact with important individuals. Definitely also it is great that he can spend time alone in his room, that means that he is creative and found himself an interesting hobby or other pastime, and that he is self-reliant and self-confident enough to commit himself to it. I am sure there is nothing to worry about, but if he can't tell now, we need to wait. If he had problems, he surely would have told you. And such chosen isolation in a room generally means important and interesting stuff to do alone, and it is great that at such young age he already found own individual interests. Often creation of presents keeps people forced to remain secret about what they are doing, so his secret pastime may be an important future gift for the family or friends. It is possible though he has some contact with his friends, only of a secret type, and often when kids together want to do something important, a project, a design, or something, they also keep secrets of their meetings and conversations. Whatever he's doing, from clairvoyance nothing bad is happening to him, and he is so immersed in his activities done in secret, that he is having lots of fun. I am sure at one point he will admit, perhaps when he finishes some stage of what he is sacrificing his time to, or just when he is ready. Nothing to worry about. Children usually disappear from sight regularly and for long periods of time because of: business plans, book writing, invention making, ingeneery construction, university studies, and stuff like that. And they are usually big projects which can change their lifestyle for two-three years in fact. No worries, he is all right. If he seems sad or quiet it's possibly because he is preoccupied with important thinking, and if he resigned from normal social fun activities for loneliness, it must be something very interesting that's worth exchanging his friends' company to. From clairvoyance, loneliness doesn't bother him, what bothers him is the need of finding solutions to obstacles in a grand project he is creating by himself. Everything will be all right.

Agata